March 24, 2009

Things I say, but can't stand.

Needless to say. (I don't say this, but I still can't stand it.) If it's needless to say, then don't say it! Or perhaps just don't say that it's needless to say. Because if it's something that you're going to say, just say it.

To be honest. Or, in all honesty. So does this mean that whatever you don't preface with "to be honest" is not true? Should not all you tell me be true?

May I ask you a question? What would happen if I said no? You know you're still going to ask the question anyway. Perhaps we could turn that question into a statement: I am going to ask you a question - why is lake Susupe wet even though it's raining on Mt. Tapochao?

My old roommate Jenni used to say, "not for anything, but..." If it's not for anything, then maybe it's one of those things that are best left unsaid.
~~~

Remember when you were a kid and you wrote letters to your class assigned pen-pal? How did most of your letters go? Maybe something like this....
Dear Pen Pal,

How are you? I am fine.

We are learning about butterflies in science class. I don't like butterflies. Even though they are pretty, they are just bugs.

On Saturday I rode my bike to brownies. Are you in brownies? I got a helping merit badge. Then I fell off my bike on my way home.

Your pal,
Deece
I need to bring it back to those days when letters just ended. When you were done writing you just ended the letter. That's it. I was always a terrible correspondent, I rarely sent letters to my friends in the states. But with the advent and mass accessibility of email, it's a lot easier to stay connected right? Sort of. I'm still not a great correspondent, but I do enjoy receiving and sending emails. But my endings are always awkward.
Fake email with awkward closing #1
Dear Friend,

Thanks for the stuff. That's cool. Here's an update on life. Blah blah blah.

Gotta run now cause I'm cooking.

Love,
Deece

Awkward closing #2
Well, I'm at work now so I better go.

Awkward closing #3
The kids are screaming, gotta go.
I could go on and on. Why can't I just end my emails? It's like I'm always giving an excuse for having to stop writing. As if my emails are subject to the theories of motion. You know, an object in motion stays in motion until something cuts it off. Or an object will travel at the same speed until some other crap happens. (Do you see why I never majored in science?)

And then there is the dreaded complementary close. What to say - love, regards, take care, thank you? Mona posed this question before. What do you usually do to end your emails?

Princess Boxer

4 comments:

  1. LOL! I love this post, Deece! I was cracking up when I read your letter to your pen pal. Yeah, that sucks, but hey, you weren't beating around the bush? Things came so easily when you're a child. As adults, we think too much about everything!

    Believe me, I can go on and on, but because it's late here in Las Vegas, I gotta go (LOL!)

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  2. That's totally how it goes right? "How are you? I am fine." Hahaha!

    Good one, Polly! :)

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  3. It's worse closing on echat. I have be known to close with: gotta pee, catch you later.

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  4. Kelli - I have totally done the "gotta pee" goodbye! LOL. By the way, I got booted off today. No surprise considering where I work. Even though I honestly know nothing and have talked with no one and have no opinion.

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I really appreciate your comments and I do my best to reply to each one. So spit it out, yo! Please.

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